April 24, 2004
For a number of reasons, first and foremost being that I am getting older and think it is time for me to start thinking about money, I have gotten serious about work. I am going back to law school. That means, pretty much from here on out, that my life is all about work. That is why I have been going into the office six days a week. That I why I check my work e-mail work before I go to bed. Because I am really involved with work now. I could say that it is just about the money but I kind of like my job. Also, I have finally reached a point where the amount that I put into work is directly proportioned to what I get out of it. So, I work more. Way more. I am approaching work with the same amount of zeal that I used to put into the bands or the radio show or the writing. It's lame, I know, working in an office is not cool, but I used to think that I was going to do those other things for a living. That's why I put so much into them. I was always a workaholic and career oriented. It is just that I used to think I was going to do something cool for a career. I don't think that anymore.
My new involvement with work took me to Columbus, OH on Thursday and Friday for a retreat. Lame. Made even lamer still by the fact that I was one of only two people from the Cleveland, OH office who signed up to go to this thing. I knew that nobody from my group was going but nobody at all? That sucked. I wish that somebody would have sent me that secret memo that said that nobody from the Cleveland, OH office was going, then I would not have made the drive. So, I am sitting in a conference room in a hotel in the arena district of Columbus, OH watching PowerPoint presentation after PowerPoint presentation about working better, new things at work, old things at work I might have missed, what they are going to be doing at work in the future, how not to be killed while walking to work and what to do if somebody tries to destroy the office with terrorism. Two days of PowerPoint presentations. Bullshit. Do you remember all of those presentations that you sat through using an overhead projector that sucked? Yeah? Well, they still suck. It is just that now people aren't fumbling for transparencies and putting them on upside down. The bad part of presentations was not the transparencies, it was that most people are not good public speakers. Now, we have wasted all of this time teaching people how to use PowerPoint instead of sending them to Clown College for some showmanship lessons. I would rather see a pro like Baby Fea up in front writing things on her small notebook than some corporate zombie clicking a clicker for some low tech animation. Boring. And I had two days of this.
On Thursday night for fun, I walked to Used Kids Records in a light rain, bought some records and walked back to the hotel in a downpour with my records in a plastic bag under my shirt. I was drenched, walking down High Street, tidal wave style, by cars, trucks, SUVs and a tow truck. I just checked, my shoes are still a little damp. I took a shower when I got back to the hotel room and watched basketball all night and slept.
Yesterday was more PowerPoint presentations about how to work better. I sat there, enduring (that is the only word that describes it). While I suffered, I thought about how lame it all is. How everybody is a geek. How just because you do something uncool for a living does not mean that you have to be uncool. I was surrounded by nerds. I was surrounded by people who laughed nervously at the speaker's lame attempts at jokes. What the fuck? What is with corporate culture? What is with name tags? What is with everybody checking their cell phones the minute there is a break in the presentation? What is with people answering voice mail messages by saying that they are in a presentation and that they will call them later? Just call them later. What is with hotels? They are not that lavish (so not lavish) unless you compare them to a motel? What passes for nice these days? The hotel lobby was not nice. It was cheap furniture with a bunch of white people with names tags standing around them. What is with all of these white people? I mean, damn it, lily white and white bread does not even come close to describing the blinding white. And it is not WASP. It is suburban strip malls. It is bullshit, that's what it is. Corporate culture. Middle America. The Interstate. It can all bite me.
I don't want to go off here and this is pretty long and rambling already. I don't know. I still think that I am hip. I still think that I have taste. And, unfortunately, I am stuck in a world that has neither hipness or taste. What do I do? We can talk about this on Monday on the Assholier than Thou Good Times Happy Friends Monday Morning Radio Show Starring Baby Fea (yea!).
Oh, yeah, it has been too much work. It's too much. I am not going into today or checking my e-mail or anything. I need a couple of minutes away from it. I will deal with it on Monday. The white people will survive without me.
posted by Thea at 7:05 AM
April 23, 2004
I was in Columbus, OH the last two days. I want to talk about the trip – just not now. What I do want to BLOG is that I thought of that missing story idea. It is the story of somebody who was a periphery character on a reality show who becomes obsessed with the idea of fame. And I came up with another one this morning. It is about a fat loudmouth who drinks at a bar called O’Looney’s and cries in private. Talk to you later.
posted by Thea at 10:20 PM
April 21, 2004
I was just looking at old BLOGS to see if I could remember an idea I had for a story. One was where a girl gets a job at a candy store and won’t stop eating candy. Another is where this businessman goes crazy and his wife and secretary keep the business running. And the other one is the one I forgot. I hope I remember it because it seemed good when I thought of it.
I felt a horrible deep depression this morning that just got worse and worse as the day went on to where I was feeling completely hopeless. As it turned out, I think I was just hungry.
Let’s all pretend that we are little professionals.
posted by Thea at 9:08 PM
April 20, 2004
"Suckers, liars get me a shovel. Some writers I know are damn devils. For them I say don't believe the hype. Yo Chuck, they must be on a pipe, right? Their pens and pads I'll snatch. 'Cause I've had it..." from "Don't Believe the Hype". Lyrics by Chuck D of Public Enemy.
I had a reality field trip today. Kind of like when I went to Joel Kaufman Reality Camp in Washington, DC in March. Today, instead of my normal life, I woke up, drove to a suburban office and worked in a suburban office all day. The drive to Independence, OH first thing in the morning in rush hour traffic was a hellish nightmare. If I had to drive to a suburban office every day, I would blow my fucking head off. No hype, suckers. For real. And if I just had to drive to work (period), well, shit, there is no fucking way in hell that I would ever do that. No way. I can't take it. The starting and the stopping and the looking at the clock and the shitty commercial radio playing nothing but commercials the entire way out there. Dude, fuck that. And you want to tell me that because they have a Cooker out there it is living, you have got to be kidding me. No way. No fucking way.
In re: yesterday's Rock and Roll Radio Show. If you were looking for me and the Baby Fea Dating Resume styled Ultimate Rock and Roll Mix set at 5:00 p.m., let's just say there was a scheduling mix up and it did not happen. Suffice to say, it was not me who was mixed up. Let's just leave it at that.
How's this for weird: Laurie is going to Tobin Sprout tonight and I am going to stay home because I am too damned tired from work. Go figure.
"I'd hang myself just to make you cry, so give me the rope and say goodbye." from "Oh Dana". Lyrics by Andrej Cuturic of the Revelers.
posted by Thea at 8:05 PM
April 18, 2004
Laurie and I are sitting in the office. We are listening to Grand Funk Railroad. She is painting her nails. I am trying to put together a set for the Rock and Roll Radio Show that I am doing tomorrow from 5:00 p.m. to 6:00 p.m. on WCSB Cleveland 89.3 FM home of the Assholier than Thou Good Times Happy Friends Monday Morning Radio Show Starring Baby Fea (yea!). I was thinking that I would try to put together the rocker version of Baby Fea?s dating resume ? like a mix CD of music that would tell a fellow rocker that if you can get into this shit then you know exactly where I am coming from as a rocker. I wanted the Rocker Resume CD (set for tomorrow?s show) to rock without being totally obvious. So, no AC/DC, Bad Company, Black Sabbath, Led Zeppelin, Motorhead or the Who and nothing played out by any of the bands that I did pick to play that are obviously classic. Also, 1968 to 1973 only, to make it fun. So, there?s what I am doing on the Rock and Roll Radio Show tomorrow from 5:00 p.m. to 6:00 p.m. Tune in and see if we can groove. Also, I am going to have to stop doing the Rock and Roll Radio Show in August when school starts so I only have a few of these left and not like I am some kind of professional record picker like Tom Fallon or Jamie Walters or He Who Can Not be Mention in this BLOG Ever Again - Ever or something but I really doubt that I will be playing rock records on the radio in any serious matter ever again so, I will be getting everything that I think is killer on the air before I?m gone.
Whatever.
I will tell you more about my idea of rock tomorrow on the Assholier than Thou Good Times Happy Friends Monday Morning Radio Show Starring Baby Fea (yea!).
posted by Thea at 9:25 PM 